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It is true.
It is true that I wish I could accept the claim that Christians have perfect lives. I wish that I could say I never make mistakes, my faith never wavers, and my mind always comprehends. I wish that life did not have to be so hard. I wish that I could say I always trust and understand God’s plan. Yes, it is true; but, it is only partially true. While part of me does wish all of the above statements described my existence, the fact of the matter is, they do not. As much as I’ve prayed for God to help me understand what His purpose is in certain situations and as many tears as I have cried over the circumstances of life, the above will never be my reality. Even though part of my heart does wish I had a perfect life, a bigger part of me does not want that to ever happen. It sounds kind of insane. Okay, it sounds completely insane. For me to actually desire that my life never be perfect and that I never fully understand God’s plan at first does sound crazy. Allow me to explain. You see, if I were to ask God to take away every storm that ever came into the ring of my boat, I would not have a story. I would never have stories of miracles. I would never have stories of redemption. I would never have stories of my Savior’s grace, mercy, and providence. Let us all be honest. If we were to watch a movie that had no action, plot twists, or tragedies for the characters to overcome or no pits of despair for them to climb out of, we would leave the theatre bored and unsatisfied. That, my friends, is the way I choose to view life. Yes, it would seem optimal and ideal if my life were a Christian fairytale but I would not be learning anything valuable. I would not have to learn to trust my unknown destiny to the hands of Jesus because, in reality, I would not need Him. So if I am going to be so bold as to pray an unbelievable prayer for God to not stop the madness of His will for my life, to never fully understand His plan, and to be so bold that I ask him to not let me have what I would consider “the perfect life,” then I am going to need Him to steady my unsteady heart. I’ll be the first one to admit that my heart does not always trust God. As much as I wish I could say that I always rest securely in the knowledge that His plans are for me even when they seem against me, I do not. I waver. I sometimes doubt when all that I can see are waves coming to crash and overtake me. For this reason I need an anchor that will hold my heart to the hope of the steadfast love of Christ. “This hope is a strong and trustworthy anchor for our souls.” – Hebrews 6:19 So I ask, will you dare to pray a prayer of insanity with me – a prayer not of escape but of invitation? Are you bold enough to invite the raging storms that threaten to take you under and sever the rope of your anchor? If you pray this prayer, I warn you that there will be times when you regret it because there are times when I do. There will be times when the storm will no longer stay on the horizon but will set it’s eye on you and move in with unquenchable tenacity. You may feel like your anchor is about to give way but friends, this Hope is a strong and trustworthy anchor. He will never let you go. He does not promise to steady the storm, but He does promise to steady our unsteady hearts through the storm. Forever yours, Kristen